Category Archives: Podcast

New Year’s Resolutions: Do They Work?

One of the beautiful things about the New Year is that it traditionally makes us feel like we can start over, improve on what was not working, and gives us an opportunity of “letting go” of what went wrong during the past year.  As 2018 was approaching a few weeks ago, I reflected on all of the things I just mentioned.  I listed the people, things, events, and work that served, or didn’t serve me in 2017.

{Amy Jaffe with Saza in Chiangmai, Thailand – 2017}

I made New Year’s resolutions last year, as I do every year, and I had to force myself to recognize that I can’t remember one year that I stuck with my resolutions religiously. I gave many a good try, but I have not been fully committed after the excitement fades. Last year was another one of those years.

Here were a few of my 2017 resolutions:

  1. Develop better communication skills, and be clearer about my own needs.
  2. Develop a regular yoga and meditation practice.
  3. Be more aware of my body weight, diet, and exercise. Plan a diet that fits in with my life and body. Lose weight, and exercise on a regular basis.

Do any of these look familiar to you?

These are some common resolutions that I hear quite often, and I jumped on the bandwagon last year on all of these.  At the end of the year I actually celebrated one of the resolutions regarding my weight, diet, and exercise.  I lost over 40 pounds last year that had been creeping up on me the past 6 years, and I feel great!  I’m on the treadmill at least 5 days a week, and my diet is mostly gluten free, vegetables, a few grains, and vegetarian.  I have kept my weight off all year and grateful to feel healthy and whole.

Now, for the “not so celebrated” resolutions….

What kind of feelings do YOU go through when you reflect on your failed commitments?  Do you feel like a failure?  Do you believe you shouldn’t try again because you just know you’ll fail again?  My feelings are similar, AND the feeling of fear rises up when I want to try them again.  How can I be better at these commitments?  Why are these resolutions so important to me? And how can they become habits?  I am sitting with all of these questions and feelings, and ready to stand up and move forward with the desire to keep trying.

Brené Brown is one of my teachers in life, and two of her books, “Daring Greatly” and “Braving the Wilderness” are my new bibles.  At the end of every year I beat myself up with guilt because I did NOT stay committed to my New Year’s resolutions.  I am a perfectionist at heart and mind, and when I am not perfect …. the guilt and anxiety take a hold of me.

“Understanding the difference between healthy striving and perfectionism is critical to laying down the shield and picking up your life. Research shows that perfectionism hampers success. In fact, it’s often the path to depression, anxiety, addiction, and life paralysis.”
― Brené BrownThe Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

Where do I go from here?

I am setting my intentions and resolutions again this year!  My intention is to follow Brené Brown’s advice and focus on healthy striving in my life.  I am one of the hosts of Indrani’s Light Foundation’s “Caring for the Caregivers” podcast.  Indrani Goradia, Jeremie Miller and I publish a bi-monthly podcast to support our Caregivers who work as staff members in domestic violence shelters.  (Available on iTunes)  In our newest episode for 2018, the three of us discussed how we can reflect on our current self-care practices, and plan for new ones as an important step in being intentional about our self-care.  We also talked about what practices worked for us in 2017, and which ones need improvement in 2018.

I am excited about starting this New Year free from guilt and shame, and acknowledging that intentions and striving for a healthier life is what my New Year’s Resolution will be!

I would love to know if this blog and our podcast episodes have been helpful for you this first month of 2018.  What have you learned so far?  Have you freed yourself of guilt, and discovered your New Year’s Resolutions?

With gratitude,

Amy

Amy Jaffe | Director of Education & Outreach
Indrani’s Light Foundation

#TBT Special Interview with Janine Shepherd

Defiant_J.Shepherd_CVRIn 2012, Indrani Goradia hosted her “Unpasteurized Joy” podcast.  She had the honor of interviewing her friend, and author, Janine Shepherd, who is an internationally renowned speaker, and inspired over a million people who watched her TED talk, “A Broken Body Isn’t a Broken Person.”  She’s was featured on “60 Minutes”, “This is Your Life”, and CNN’s “Turning Points”, with Dr Sanjay Gupta.  Since then, Janine has written a book called, “Defiant: A Broken Body is Not A Broken Person.”

janineJanine is also known as the “walking paraplegic,” after a tragic accident stripped her of her Olympic dreams and changed her life forever.  You can watch her TED talk here:  https://youtu.be/bX32U_hfri4

 

Since the political climate in the United States has been incredibly polarizing in recent months, we wanted to share some inspiration and hope with you today.  If you are feeling overwhelmed with emotions of hopelessness, this #TBT podcast is for you!

Please SHARE this interview with a friend or family member if this inspired you.  Also, Janine’s book, “Defiant” gives a detailed account of her story, and it will blow you away. Purchase her book HERE!

Break the Silence: LIVE CALL with Indrani

indrani-in-india-2Indrani Goradia has just returned from India after continuing her global mission to end violence against women and girls. She visited a different city on this trip, and brought back some lessons from her experience there. Indrani was able to teach our Live A Brighter Life classes to groups of women and men, who did a phenomenal job in participating and learning about boundaries, saying “No,” guilt and shame, and most importantly, self-care.

This trip to India was special. Indrani wants to share her experience, and some of the feedback she received from the men, in particular. The lessons Indrani learned from India brought her back home with an urgency to “Break the Silence.”indrani-in-india

As we recognize Domestic Violence Awareness month here in the United States, we need to make real change, and stop domestic violence globally. We MUST talk openly about the issue, not just on Facebook, or YouTube, or when standing in front of big audiences.

We need to break the silence and talk with each other, openly and honestly. Daily.

 

If you want to join Indrani for this LIVE CALL on Thursday, October 20th, 2016 at 10am PT | 1pm ET, all you need to do is use the following information (no email address or option required):

live-call-with-indrani-oct-2016rConference Dial-In Number:
(605) 562-3140
Participant Access Code:
694881#
Canadian Caller Instructions:
Dial: (559)546-1400
Then proceed with regular conference line numbers above.

If you would like to receive a reminder about the call, and hear even more from Indrani, you can sign up for the call here:

http://indranislight.org/break-the-silence/

We could also use your support in spreading the word about this live call with Indrani. You can use the following text on Facebook, twitter, or your social media platform of choice to get your friends and family involved in stopping the silence.

  • Facebook Post |  Stop the Silence: Join me on October 20th at 10am Pacific Time to listen to Indrani Goradia speak about the newest lessons she has learned about ending domestic violence globally http://bit.ly/2ewKDPf
  • For twitter | Stop the Silence: October 20th Indrani Goradia shares what she has learned about ending domestic violence globally http://bit.ly/2ewKDPf

 

Love and light,

Team ILF

 

 

Finding Your Strengths

finding-your-strengthsOne of the workshops we teach at Indrani’s Light Foundation is called “Finding Resilience.”  We talk about the importance of shame resilience, understanding the attributes of empathy, identifying your shame story, naming your trusted network of people, and lastly, we explore your strengths that help you through your everyday life.

Are you facing a challenge that is coming up soon?  Maybe you are planning to have a difficult conversation with a friend, or family member?  Or maybe you need to ask for a raise.

Right now you may be in “survival mode.”  We often numb ourselves from our true feelings, needs, and desires.  We can also lose our sense of identity and our values.  But in order to lead a full and meaningful life, we must reconnect with ourselves.  This mean we connect with our deeply held values.

In order to recover from the survival mode, we must find our strengths.

The first thing we ask people to do is to take the VIA Character Strengths Test.  This is a place to start to begin identifying some of your most powerful strengths.  Go to {this website now} and take the free test.

What strengths are you bringing to the table?

The second thing we’d like to offer you is a personal, short meditation from Indrani to help you find your strengths.

In the past, think of something you did that you were proud of.  What were the strengths that made this happen?  Were you brave?  Did you have a love of learning?  Maybe you used humor, or practiced gratitude.

Focus on the memory, and bring it with you when you go ask for that raise, or have the difficult conversation with your friend or family member.

Here is Indrani’s meditation, “Finding Your Strengths.”

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*Meditate With Indrani *
recording series

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[Meditate with Indrani}

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online workshop series

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*Meditate With Indrani* ~ Stop at the Drive Thru

Meditate with Indrani imageToday’s 3-minute meditation is about giving you permission to experience 5 percent more joy today.  Indrani has provided a “Drive Thru” meditation for those of you who need to check in with yourselves during a busy day.  There are times when we are unable to sit still for awhile to take care of ourselves.  Hopefully this short meditation will give you the time you need to tap into a little more joy.

Namaste.

Indrani presents ….  {“Stop at the Drive Thru”}

 

*Meditate With Indrani *
recording series

Click here to access her FREE meditations

[Meditate with Indrani}

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Live A Brighter Life
online workshop series

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[Live A Brighter Life}

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for the
“Caregiver Project”

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[The Caregiver Project}

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Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most

lost imageI lost something the other day (not my mind … I am coming to that).

It was a device.

A device that kept me connected to the outside world.  A device that helped me to accomplish my mission to end violence to women.

It was my iPad.

First, I reached out to a friend to go to my house to see if I left it there. Nope, not at home. Then I thought that I must have left it on the plane. My heart sank.

So I was about to give up, but then remembered I had used it to Skype earlier in the day. My heart felt happy. So it had to be somewhere in the hotel room.

Unless I took it to a restaurant and left it there.  My heart sank again

I decided to call my “MacGyver.”  Her real name is Amy Jaffe and she keeps me sane, along with my other ILF Team members, Stacie and Jeremie.

Amy says she could launch my iCloud account to help me locate it.  After a few minutes she said, “It’s in the building, where you are now?

I began to furiously search again.
I even looked in the mini bar!
I could not find it ANYWHERE, and my room is small!

I was desperate.
I was also going nuts!

It was time to give up, so I tried to take a nap.
Then …. BOOM! I reached out and inserted my hand between the mattress and headboard, and THERE it was. My heart felt happy.

Okay, so now, how do I relate this to when I feel out of control and losing my sane mind? The mind that keeps me connected to my inner wonderful world?

What do I DO when the crazy mind wants to hijack me?

First, I can call a friend. I can allow my friend to offer ideas of where my mind could be. My friend could ask funny questions like, “Where did you see your mind last?” “What were you doing when you realized that you had lost your mind?” “Does your mind usually wander off without your knowledge?”

Okay, so the last two questions are not funny. They can actually help.

My responses can be something like, “Well the last time I had my mind was before the conversation with Mother, Father, child, boss, customer service person, husband, ex-husband, etc.”

Get it?

You get to THINK out loud about when last you were in control of your own mind.
When you have sorta-kinda identified when you lost it, you can rest quietly knowing it is close at hand!

It’s somewhere in your space.

It may be hiding in a closet, afraid of the crazy mind that took over, but it is not gone forever.

You must practice extreme self-care at this point to locate it and coax it back to you.
I decided to take a nap, remember?

** You can download our self-care module here and find an easy self-care tool and begin to practice it.

I use the tool of gratitude every night before I go to bed.  Some nights I am so wound up that my crazy mind tells the better part of me to, “Just forget about all that stupid gratitude.  What is it getting you any way?”  Then my sane mind has to say, “I will even be grateful that I can ignore that unhelpful message,” and then begin to write down my gratitude list for that day.

In the meantime, here is a short 12-minute meditation to help you to settle into some peace and tranquility.

Love and light,
Indrani

 

*Meditate With Indrani *
recording series

Click here to access her FREE meditations

[Meditate with Indrani}

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Live A Brighter Life
online workshop series

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[Live A Brighter Life}

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[The Caregiver Project}

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*Meditate With Indrani* ~ Sit With a Wise One

Meditate with Indrani imageIndrani would love to share some of her meditations with you.  Her desire is to assist you in beginning a meditation practice, if you do not have one.   If you have a meditation practice, these weekly meditations will help you to work on living a brighter life.

Today’s 12-minute meditation is about sitting with someone who is very wise.  Is this person Nelson Mandela?  Mother Teresa?  Buddha?  Jesus?  Maybe it’s a close friend whom you admire, and consider them very wise.  Indrani will help you breathe in the wisdom this wise person has to offer you.  You can breathe in compassion, forgiveness, future thinking, or maybe a big dream of changing the world.  You will come to see that the wisdom from this person does not just belong to them …. it belongs to YOU.

“Sit with a Wise One” Meditation Recording:

*Meditate With Indrani *
recording series

Click here to access her FREE meditations

[Meditate with Indrani}

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Live A Brighter Life
online workshop series

Click here to access our FREE online recordings

[Live A Brighter Life}

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Send us to Houston
for the
“Caregiver Project”

Click here to support us with a click of a button

[The Caregiver Project}

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*Meditate With Indrani* ~ Opening Your Heart

Meditate with Indrani image

Indrani would love to share some of her meditations with you.  Her desire is to assist you in beginning a meditation practice, if you do not have one.   If you have a meditation practice, these weekly meditations will help you to work on living a brighter life.

Today’s 8-minute meditation is about opening your heart and loving yourself unconditionally.  Self acceptance is the first step to loving ourselves without condition.  Listen to this meditation carefully, and then go to the mirror and say to the person you see, “I love you.”

“Opening Your Heart” Meditation Recording:

*Meditate With Indrani *
recording series

Click here to access her FREE meditations

[Meditate with Indrani} 

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Live A Brighter Life
online workshop series

Click here to access our FREE online recordings

[Live A Brighter Life}

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Send us to Houston
for the
“Caregiver Project”

Click here to support us with a click of a button

[The Caregiver Project}

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*Meditate with Indrani* ~ May You Be Well

Meditate with Indrani image

Indrani would love to share some of her meditations with you.  Her desire is to assist you in beginning a meditation practice, if you do not have one.   If you have a meditation practice, these weekly meditations will help you to work on living a brighter life.

Do you need permission to be well today?  Would you like to feel free from suffering, and feel at peace?  Today’s 1-minute meditation is called, “May You Be Well.”  Take time to forgive yourself, and know you are perfect.

“May You Be Well” Meditation Recording:

*Meditate with Indrani* ~ Finding Your One True Love

Meditate with Indrani image

Indrani would love to share some of her meditations with you.  Her desire is to assist you in beginning a meditation practice, if you do not have one.   If you have a meditation practice, these weekly meditations will help you to work on living a brighter life.

Are you looking for your one true love?  Or maybe you need a way to renew the love you have with your current partner.  Today’s 10-minute meditation is called, “Finding Your One True Love.”  This is a meditation that will enable you to be in a space to draw in the love and qualities you would like to attract with your true love.

As you meditate, allow yourself to imagine the qualities you want to attract in your one true love.  Identify the qualities …. Is it kindness? Funny? Intelligent? Someone who respects nature?  Now imagine FEELING the joy and happiness as you surround yourself with your true love.  You are becoming the essence of all you wish to attract in your life.  Listen below, and let us know if this helped.

“Finding Your One True Love” Meditation Recording