Daring to question the regular-ness of life…

When time is non linear…it is super sweet.
I just spent 8 days with 25 strangers.
After 8 days a normal person would not expect to know more than a few
of these people and, not very well.
I have known people for far longer than 8 days and still feel like I do not know them at all. I have limited and shallow conversations with them and am relieved when we part. I am sure they feel much the same. It is funny how we humans can hide behind social masks and cultural “SHOULD” masks that make it easy to remain invisible. Marshall B. Rosenberg says that “should” is a violent word. I agree. All of the “shoulding” I have done on myself and on others has only brought me pain and distance and has contributed to my being invisible.

Staying invisible to most of the world makes it safe for me. Often
times when I take risks and show my vulnerabilities to those I think I
can trust leaves me really regretting the risk I took.
Something as simple as needing to tell someone that I am sad and need
to cry can, and often does, bring out the fear in them that makes them
strike back with a “oh for God’s sake, get over it. Others have it so much worse”.

But on this clown trip to Guatemala I took risks with strangers. I
took risks with being vulnerable. I told strangers that I loved them
and I really meant it. They accepted it without hesitation.
I cried within the safety of the circle and they accepted it without
judgment. How freeing that felt to be held in safety and non judgment.
Instead of words during an intense hour of sharing, I chose to walk
around the circle and share energy by looking into their eyes as I
send good wishes of peace and love. Everyone chose to look back at my
soul and accept my love.

How can this happen in so short a time?
Why can we not have safety and acceptance from those closest and dearest to us?
What are we so afraid of?

I am afraid that I will be judged and labeled.
I have been labeled in the past as “too emotional” which only meant that I wore my heart on my sleeve and that I dared to show my vulnerabilities.
So now, my heart remains hidden and I play the social game and everyone seems to be so much happier for it.

But am I?
Am I happier to be locked away and closed off for fear of being labeled?

Questions, too many to list.
Answers, too few at this moment.

I have learned to be happy with questions because they make me curious about
the plethora of responses waiting in my heart.

I invite you to question all the facets of your life and be quiet in
the safety of the questions.
Do not grasp for answers. They are there and they will find you.
Your job is to keep questioning.
Be grateful that YOU CAN dare to question your life and world.
Questions are the essence of all new discoveries.
Questions belong to those of us who are awake.
Awaken and question.
Dream and question.
Live your life and watch the answers unfold right in front of your eyes.

Love and light,

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