My inner dialogue would be so mean and hateful towards myself that nothing anyone else could say would even come close to the sting I could give to me.
I have been working on this, slowly and deliberately. It has been a journey.
One never really knows how one will do on a test until the test is over.
I had one such test a few weeks ago while pulling out of a tight parking spot from a Bed and Breakfast.
I had a rental car that was very low to the ground and I was trying to get out of a tight parking space.
I scratched the rental car and I did not beat up myself.
I heard the S. C. R. A. T. C. H.
And thought, “Oh no … that’s not a good sound!”
I did NOT think, “There you go you idiot, can’t drive to save your life!”
I pulled the car to a safe place and got out to take a look.
Yep, I did a good job.
It would be a claim for sure.
I filled the car with gas before I returned it, and I called the insurance company to start the claim process.
I kept a clear head, got all the details and was able to procure all the paperwork needed from the car rental company.
I got on my flight and took a nap.
Yep… I was able to take a nap!
I was so calm and so peaceful with myself that I was able to PUT OUT of my mind all that the morning brought.
This skill, of staying present, has been hard fought.
I used to really beat myself up if I made a mistake.
I was so hard on myself that I made myself sick.
I encourage you to listen to your self talk as you go through life and begin to clean it up and give yourself a break.
Love and light,