Tag Archives: compassion fatigue

Caring for the Caregivers: Sacrificing Holiday Time for Coworkers – Episode #11

Holidays can be stressful. Family, friends, extra expenses, and finding time to get everything done, while trying to enjoy yourself, can push you to the edge.

A coworker at the shelter asking you to switch shifts, or give up your holiday time, only adds to this holiday-madness and stress.

In today’s episode Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie discuss three tools you can use to have a conversation with your coworker, stick to your boundaries, and still protect the relationship.

Episdoe Time Codes

00:00 Introduction.
00:43 Scenario.
02:05 Amy – Guilt and shame triggers.
07:28 Discussion about Guilt and shame triggers.
13:16 Indrani – Working from your strengths.
19:50 Discussion about Working from your strengths.
24:40 Jeremie – What happens when you don’t set boundaries.
29:30 Discussion about What happens when you don’t set boundaries.
34:05 Conclusion

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

VIA Strength Survey – Free
Going to the Movies – Episode #3
Going to the Movies – Episode #5

Caring for the Caregivers: Feeling Guilty When Saying “NO” to Your Supervisor – Episode #9

When you want to make an impact on people’s lives, it can be hard to say “no” when asked to help. But what if providing that help will end up hurting you? In this episode Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie share three tools you can use to say “no” to your supervisor, without feeling guilty, when asked to do something you don’t feel comfortable doing.

Episode Time Codes

00:00 Introduction
01:02 Scenario
01:50 Amy – “I want to be perceived as…”
06:04 Discussion about the “I want to be perceived as…” tool.
08:06 Jeremie – Delivering a “Yes. No. Yes?”
12:41 Discussion of the “Yes. No. Yes?” tool.
16:50 Indrani – Self-care: Press pause and think about your answer.
20:50 Discussion of the “Press pause and think about your answer” tool.
28:10 Conclusion

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

The Power of a Positive No: Save the deal. Save the relationship – and still say no

Caring for the Caregivers: Dealing With a Lack of Appreciation and Gratitude Part Two- Episode #7

You put a lot of passion, love, and effort into supporting your clients at work, and your family at home. It can be challenging (and very emotional) when the people you are helping don’t say “thank you” or show any gratitude for the support and energy you give them. In this episode Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie share three more tools (in addition to the tools shared in Episode #5) you can use to change your perspective when someone doesn’t show you appreciation.

Episode Time Codes

01:08 Introduction
02:33 Scenario
03:15 Indrani – Bring self-compassion into the formula
06:36 Discussion about self-compassion
14:55 Amy – Practice Critical Awareness
20:46 Discussion about using Critical Awareness
25:48 Jeremie – Find an “Appreciation Buddy”
28:13 Jeremie – Think about a “Future State”
30:24 Conclusion

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

LINK: Episode #5 Dealing with a lack of Appreciation and Gratitude Part One
LINK: Episode #5 A Meditation on Self-Kindness
LINK: Kristen Neff’s Self-Compassion Test
LINK: Affirmation Checklist

Caring for the Caregivers: Dealing With a Lack of Appreciation and Gratitude Part One – Episode #5

You put a lot of passion, love, and effort into supporting your clients at work, and your family at home. It can be challenging (and very emotional) when the people you are helping don’t say “thank you” or show any gratitude for the support and energy you give them. In this episode learn three tools you can use to change your perspective when someone doesn’t show you appreciation.

Episode Time Codes

00:58 Introduction
02:42 Scenario
03:32 Indrani – Use the “Going to the Movies Tool” to reflect on your actions and reactions when someone shows no gratitude.
08:08 Discussion of the “Going to the Movies Tool”
12:00 Amy – Use the “How do you want to be perceived” exercise to identify your triggers in this situation.
16:46 Discussion of the “How do you want to be perceived” exercise.
21:54 Jeremie – Use PERMA to focus on your side of the relationship and don’t depend on the other person showing gratitude.
27:30 Discussion of the PERMA tool
31:00 Conclusion and summary of the three tools

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

LINK: Find your strengths using the VIA Strengths Survey
BOOK: Flourish by Martin Seligman

Caring for the Caregivers: Take Care of Yourself FIRST, Then Take Care of Your Family – Episode #3

As a Caregiver in a domestic violence shelter you are faced with the challenge of supporting all of your clients at work, then having to return home and take care of your family. In this episode Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie share the importance of taking care of yourself FIRST by setting boundaries and learning to tell your family a “positive NO”.

Episode Time Codes

01:03 Introduction of this episode’s scenario
02:56 Jeremie shares a self-awareness exercise called “Going to the movies”
06:35 Amy discusses the four types of boundaries
14:10 Indrani explains how to deliver a Positive No
20:40 Discussion: you are always setting and breaking boundaries.
25:55 Discussion: supporting others in your life with setting boundaries
29:15 Summary of the three tools

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

BOOK: Coping with infuriating, mean, critical people: The Destructive Narcissistic Pattern – Nina Brown

Caring for the Caregivers: Six Tools for Building and Maintaining Positive Relationships – Episode #1

Building and maintaining positive relationships in your life, while working long hours at work and then taking care of family at home, is a huge challenge. In this episode learn the six tools (plus one bonus tool) that Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie use everyday with the important people in their lives.

Episode Time Codes


01:00 Introduction
02:35 Indrani shares the definition of a boundary and how to use this definition with people in your life.
05:40 Amy shares how to use empathy when listening.
09:48 Jeremie shares how to use 10 minute breaks to change roles in your life and be more present.
16:25 Indrani discusses how to identify when you are being triggered.
21:40 Amy explains the difference between being self-FULL and being selfish
26:47 Bonus tool: “What story am I making up about this?”
28:00 Jeremie asks the question: “Is what I am about to say or do going to improve this relationship?”
31:10 Summary of all six tools and the bonus tool

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

VIDEO: It’s not about the Nail
BOOK: Daring Greatly by Brene Brown

Caring for the Caregivers: Introductions and why ILF’s mission to support Domestic Violence Caregivers is so important – Episode 0

As you listen to the “Caring for the Caregivers Podcast” you might be wondering: What is Indrani’s Light Foundation? Exactly who are Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie? Why are they creating this podcast? You can find the answer to all of these questions and more in Episode 0!

Episode Time Codes


00:59 Introduction
01:45 Who is Indrani? Why is this work important to Indrani?
03:55 Who is Amy? Why is this work important to Amy?
06:30 Who is Jeremie? Why is this work important to Jeremie?
08:40 Indrani’s Light Foundation Mission Statement and history
12:15 The Caregiver Project
15:55 The Caregiver Podcast
20:50 Final thoughts