Tag Archives: indranis light foundation

Caring for the Caregivers: Dealing With a Lack of Appreciation and Gratitude – Episode #5 Part One

You put a lot of passion, love, and effort into supporting your clients at work, and your family at home. It can be challenging (and very emotional) when the people you are helping don’t say “thank you” or show any gratitude for the support and energy you give them. In this episode learn three tools you can use to change your perspective when someone doesn’t show you appreciation.

Episode Time Codes

00:58 Introduction
02:42 Scenario
03:32 Indrani – Use the “Going to the Movies Tool” to reflect on your actions and reactions when someone shows no gratitude.
08:08 Discussion of the “Going to the Movies Tool”
12:00 Amy – Use the “How do you want to be perceived” exercise to identify your triggers in this situation.
16:46 Discussion of the “How do you want to be perceived” exercise.
21:54 Jeremie – Use PERMA to focus on your side of the relationship and don’t depend on the other person showing gratitude.
27:30 Discussion of the PERMA tool
31:00 Conclusion and summary of the three tools

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

LINK: Find your strengths using the VIA Strengths Survey
BOOK: Flourish by Martin Seligman

Caring for the Caregivers Meditation – Not Feeling Appreciated by Others – Episode #4

In this meditation Indrani shares a meditation to support you when you are not feeling appreciated by a friend or family member, colleague, or your boss.

Caring for the Caregivers: Take Care of Yourself FIRST, Then Take Care of Your Family – Episode #3

As a Caregiver in a domestic violence shelter you are faced with the challenge of supporting all of your clients at work, then having to return home and take care of your family. In this episode Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie share the importance of taking care of yourself FIRST by setting boundaries and learning to tell your family a “positive NO”.

Episode Time Codes

01:03 Introduction of this episode’s scenario
02:56 Jeremie shares a self-awareness exercise called “Going to the movies”
06:35 Amy discusses the four types of boundaries
14:10 Indrani explains how to deliver a Positive No
20:40 Discussion: you are always setting and breaking boundaries.
25:55 Discussion: supporting others in your life with setting boundaries
29:15 Summary of the three tools

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

BOOK: Coping with infuriating, mean, critical people: The Destructive Narcissistic Pattern – Nina Brown

Caring for the Caregivers Meditation – Using your breathing to deal with difficult conversations – Episode #2

In this meditation Indrani reminds you to breath, and explains why remembering to breath in the middle of a difficult conversation or crisis is the only sustainable way to handle these situations.

Caring for the Caregivers: Six Tools for Building and Maintaining Positive Relationships – Episode #1

Building and maintaining positive relationships in your life, while working long hours at work and then taking care of family at home, is a huge challenge. In this episode learn the six tools (plus one bonus tool) that Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie use everyday with the important people in their lives.

Episode Time Codes


01:00 Introduction
02:35 Indrani shares the definition of a boundary and how to use this definition with people in your life.
05:40 Amy shares how to use empathy when listening.
09:48 Jeremie shares how to use 10 minute breaks to change roles in your life and be more present.
16:25 Indrani discusses how to identify when you are being triggered.
21:40 Amy explains the difference between being self-FULL and being selfish
26:47 Bonus tool: “What story am I making up about this?”
28:00 Jeremie asks the question: “Is what I am about to say or do going to improve this relationship?”
31:10 Summary of all six tools and the bonus tool

Links and Resources mentioned in this episode

VIDEO: It’s not about the Nail
BOOK: Daring Greatly by Brene Brown

Caring for the Caregivers: Introductions and why ILF’s mission to support Domestic Violence Caregivers is so important – Episode 0

As you listen to the “Caring for the Caregivers Podcast” you might be wondering: What is Indrani’s Light Foundation? Exactly who are Indrani, Amy, and Jeremie? Why are they creating this podcast? You can find the answer to all of these questions and more in Episode 0!

Episode Time Codes


00:59 Introduction
01:45 Who is Indrani? Why is this work important to Indrani?
03:55 Who is Amy? Why is this work important to Amy?
06:30 Who is Jeremie? Why is this work important to Jeremie?
08:40 Indrani’s Light Foundation Mission Statement and history
12:15 The Caregiver Project
15:55 The Caregiver Podcast
20:50 Final thoughts

“Savor the Season” by Stacie Kenton

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“Tis the season,” so it is said.  For some, it’s a season of joy.  For others, a season of sorrow.  And yet for others, it’s a season of chaos and the feelings of the “unknown.”  At Indrani’s Light, we teach a workshop series called, “Live A Brighter Life.”  One of the modules focuses on self-care.  We talk about daily routines and ways to practice self-care that can be accomplished at a moment’s notice.  One of those ways is using the outdoors as an outlet and release of negative energy, or absorb the beauty of nature to fill your spirit up with happiness and joy.  Whatever your need is in the moment, nature is calling your name!

stacie-kentonOur Director of Relationships & Executive Administrator, Stacie Kenton, wrote an amazing blog this month to get us through the end of the year.  It can many times be a stressful time for us, and we need a reminder to take care of ourselves.

In her personal blog, “Savor the Season,” Stacie gives us 4 tips to connect with nature:

  1. Take it outside
  2. Take full advantage of sunny days
  3. Savor the season’s pleasures
  4. Be present

We encourage you to GO HERE and enjoy Stacie’s full blog.  As Stacie says here …. “I hope you choose to live in this winter and not just through it.”

15 Days of Impact

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This holiday season we are celebrating “15 Days of Impact.”  It’s our way of acknowledging and offering gratitude for all of you who supported and donated to our foundation this year.  Because of your donations, you made an incredible impact on our mission to end violence against women.

So many lives have been touched.
So many women and children have been affected by our Live A Brighter Life curriculum.
So many caregivers who work at women’s shelters are feeling healthier, and navigating their jobs with more confidence, and practicing self-care.

 

“15 Days of Impact”

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15-days-of-impact-finalDay #1 Impact:  Those of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible for 9 people to become certified trainers for Indrani’s Light Foundation!

15-days-of-impact-day-2Day #2 Impact:  Those of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible for two of our new ILF trainers to teach the Live A Brighter Life Curriculum online to their own communities!

15-days-of-impact-day-3Day #3 ImpactWithout your support and donation, we would not have been able to send our master trainers, Jeremie Miller and Amy Jaffe, to Houston this year to pursue our Caregiver Project, and teach our LABL curriculum to the staff at the Fort Bend Women’s Center, and keep them from burning out of this challenging career.

15-days-of-impact-day-4Day #4 ImpactWithout your support and donation, we would not have been able to continue monthly follow up calls to the women’s shelters who are involved in our Caregiver Project.

15-days-of-impact-day-5Day #5 Impact: Those of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible to complete our summer online Live A Brighter Life course, co-taught by Amy Jaffe and our new volunteer certified trainers.

15-days-of-impact-day-6Day #6 ImpactWithout your support and donation, we would not have been able to send our Director of Education & Training, Amy Jaffe, and our newest certified ILF volunteer trainer, Yvette McIntire, to Houston this fall to teach our Caregiver Project curriculum to the staff of three women’s shelters!

 

15-days-of-impact-day-7Day #7 ImpactThose of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible for a Portland, Oregon shelter to sign up for our Caregiver Project for their staff!

 

15-days-of-impact-day-8Day #8 ImpactWithout your support and donation, we would not have been able to provide our new series of “Meditations by Indrani” for people ready to live a brighter life.

 

15-days-of-impact-day-9Day #9 ImpactThose of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible to support other domestic violence awareness campaigns, including Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and the United Nation’s “Orange the World” 16 days of activism to end violence against women and girls.

 

15-days-of-impact-day-10Day #10 Impact:   Without your support and donation, we would not have been able to complete a second online fundraiser to raise money to teach the Caregiver Project curriculum to the staff of three women’s shelters in Houston, TX.

15-days-of-impact-day-11Day #11 ImpactThose of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible to share and document the global work Indrani is doing to increase awareness about violence against women.

 

 

 

15-days-of-impact-day-12Day #12 Impact:  Those of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible for our Caregiver Project to impact our caregivers by showing:

a) 47% increase in their understanding of personal boundaries and why they are important;
b) 43% improvement on understanding why personal boundaries are important to their well-being;
c) 41% increase in the caregivers’ ability to communicate when their boundaries have been crossed, and taking action to protect their boundaries.

 

15-days-of-impact-day-13Day #13 ImpactWithout your support and donation, we would not have been able to share and support our mission through social media!

 

15-days-of-impact-day-14Day #14 ImpactThose of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible for the Caregiver Project to help our caregivers make big improvements in their own self-care, showing:

  1. 43% increase in identifying what activities they can do to keep themselves healthy;
  2. 80% increase in their commitment to making self-care a priority in their lives;
  3. 65% improvement in their ability to deal with burnout.

 

 

15-days-of-impact-day-15Day #15 ImpactThose of you who donated and supported Indrani’s Light Foundation in 2016 made it possible for us to teach, raise awareness, support caregivers, certify trainers, and take action to continue our mission to end violence against women.

 

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If you would like to know more about how you can support Indrani’s Light in making even more of an impact in 2017 you can donate here: http://indranislight.org/15-days-of-impact-2016/

OR DONATE HERE

2016 “Orange the World” Campaign Video Message: Day 13

Here is Indrani’s “Day 13” personal “call to action” video message to you, as we continue to support the UN Women’s “Orange the World” campaign to end violence against women and girls.

Today, Indrani wants to speak directly to those of you experiencing violence in your homes.  You can decide to end violence within your four walls.  #my4walls #brightlife #16days

Please share this video on social media! You can find our Facebook page at “Indrani’s Light.”  You can access all #16days of personal video messages from Indrani.

Let’s END violence against women and girls together!

“ORANGE THE WORLD”

Follow us on Twitter @indranis_light #orangetheworld #16days

 

*Meditate With Indrani *
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Click here to access her FREE meditations

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Live A Brighter Life
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Click here to access our FREE online recordings

[Live A Brighter Life}

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It is a big deal: It happened to me

orange-the-world-w-ilf-logoThe unusual topic of conversation seems to follow me.  At business meetings, dinner parties, and coffee dates, people keep talking to me about their childhood abuse.  It makes sense:  my story of abuse motivates my work, and I don’t stop talking about my mission to end violence in every home {TEDTalk}.  Because I share my vulnerable story, people open up to me; some tell of severe cases, others of the occasional slap or scream.  It must be human nature to diffuse pain and suffering because most say that they deserved the abuse.

Let me tell you this… I did not deserve it.

I did not deserve to be beaten because the baby pooped in his diaper and smeared it on the wall.  The baby was one years old and I was five.  I was told to watch the baby, and I was watching the baby.  Regardless, I did not deserve to be hit.  Nothing a child does merits physical pain and emotional suffering – even if it’s to “teach a lesson.”

This is but one incident of parental anger and rage that was not right.  My life of violence was a big deal to me as a child, but it became even bigger when it reared its ugly head after I became a mother.  In my TEDxTalk , I describe how I had to fight the beast inside me for the sake of my own innocent child. I believed, and still do, that “if we do not claim our abuse, we will repeat it.”  It was a big deal to my son that I never beat him. It was a big deal to me that I saved a new generation from violence.

We all have a Moral Imperative to end violence in the world, the majority of which is done towards women and children.  November 25 is the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women and we must all use our voices to make the issue of Gender-Based Violence a big deal.  I will be using my voice in my home country, Trinidad, during the 16 days of Gender Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, to ensure that the issue of violence is not ignored as part of my work with  Maverick Collective and Population Services International (PSI).  I am Trinidadian and am proud to be.  I am, however, not proud that violence is so pervasive and normalized.  Many Trinidadians are of the opinion that violence is needed to “discipline.”  This is not so.

There is much research that shows children who receive violence suffer not only in the present moment but also long into the future.  According to the Centers of Disease Control  abused children are plagued with a long list of repercussions from depression and suicides, to inability to maintain healthy intimate relationships, to becoming abusers themselves.  So if childhood abuse is so common in Trinidad, no wonder 1 in 3 Trinidadians have experienced physical violence from their most recent intimate partner, according to a PSI-Caribbean study.

Reports of crimes related to sexual assault and domestic violence increased by nearly 50% between 2013 and 2014 according to the UN in the Universal Periodic Review of Trinidad and Tobago.  But it doesn’t have to be this way.  Abuse doesn’t have to keep happening to children.  Relationships don’t have to be plagued with violence.  It starts with you. Determine your Adverse Childhood Experiences Score to understand how your childhood may have affected your physical and emotional growth.  If violence happened to you, it is a big deal.  But you also have the power to end it, in your own home, starting today.

Let’s #orangetheworld together, because TOGETHER WE ARE MIGHTY!

With Love & Light,

Indrani Goradia | Founder
Indrani’s Light Foundation