You’ve probably had situations like this…
You can’t put together a sentence.
You have something to say but the words don’t come across.
There is sound from your voice but no one seems to be hearing you.
I recently wondered what I needed to do to be understood because my words were not coming across to others.
I so desperately wanted to be heard. I wanted to jump out of my skin I so wanted to be heard.
It was frustrating.
Then I became angry.
I am angry because they are not hearing me.
I am angry that my message is not being understood by them.
I am angry because I am not getting the response I want from them.
What I realized is that my anger is not so much about them but about me.
I am afraid to be 100% honest about what I need which makes me angry……angry because I don’t feel safe enough in a relationship to be honest.
I am afraid of offending someone which makes me angry….angry at myself for being afraid of the truth.
I am afraid of losing their friendship which makes me angry…..angry because if they are my true friend then, damn it, I should be able to be truthful.
I am afraid of losing their love which makes me angry…..angry that I may not be lovable enough that they will still love me even if I tell them what I need.
And if I did offend, lose their love or lose their friendship then perhaps they are not someone I should be speaking to.
So the next time you are talking with someone and they don’t seem to be hearing you, ask yourself:
Who am I really angry at?
If you are angry at yourself, ask yourself why?
Once you answer the “why” the other answers become clearer.