All posts by Jeremie Miller

Playing Hide and Seek with Gender Based Violence in your world

It struck me today that one of the first steps we all must take in the fight against gender based violence is to start actively paying attention and noticing gender based violence.

How we each do this will be different, but for me, since starting my work at ILF, it means filtering the world through a new lens and quietly asking myself “was that gender based violence?” or “is there a message here about gender based violence?”

When someone like TMZ decides to post a video that is an extreme and obvious case of gender based violence (as in the Ray Rice situation) it is easy for everyone to say “well yes, that was a case of gender based violence, we need to do something about it.”

But what about all of the non-obvious, non-in-your-face examples?

  • What about the two kids that I always see playing in the local playground, sometimes with their 2 year old sister. Why do they NEVER want to be at home?
  • What about the gym teacher at the local high school who constantly smirks at his male students when one of the more well-endowed girls jogs by in class?
  • What about the sad little girl who went to the day home next door to my house that nobody noticed until the caregiver’s husband went to jail last year for molesting her?

If we are observing the world like everyone else all of these may slip below our radar.

But, if we start actively watching for gender based violence (and I am not saying this is easy, so take care of yourself) the number of incidents starts to become more and more clear, and it is only then we start to realize how important the commitment to ending gender based violence really is.

So, what was it that struck me today and brought this realization into the light?

The song Face Down by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. This song has been out since 2007 and is tied as the longest-running song on the Modern Rock Tracks chart at 52 weeks. I have heard it countless times and thought nothing about it other than “great song, I like it”.

Today I watched the music video, with my new found GBV filter, and, wow, was I missing the point:

Link: http://youtu.be/6Ux6SlOE9Qk

 

Share your ideas about making gender based violence more obvious to the world in the comments below.

 

Love & light,

 

Jeremie Miller

ILF Team Member & Guest Blogger

LABL 007: Words From a SURVIVOR – Emily Anne Webber

Welcome to Episode #7 of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast Indrani speaks with Emily Anne Webber about surviving and, eventually, leaving her 30 year long abusive marriage. You will learn:

  • How a loving and respectful childhood led to an abusive marriage
  • Why Emily stayed and why she eventually left
  • Tips on what to do once you are ready to leave
  • Lessons Emily has learned and how she is moving forward

You can find Emily on facebook at: facebook.com/marriedwithromance
You can read more at www.marriedwithromance.com

If you have a question you can connect with Emily at: Emily@marriedwithromance.com

Podcast Recording

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When something so bad turns out to be so good….

*Psst.. Did you know you can highlight any sentence in this post to automatically share it via Twitter or Facebook? Go ahead, give it a try!**

When you read the video title “Ray Rice Inspired Makeup Tutorial” you probably get a chill down your spine.

How could a comedian make light of an incident as serious as this?

Well, give the video a watch because Megan MacKay pretty much nails it when she uses comedy to talk about this serious subject.

The strange part after watching this video is it sheds light on the possibility that as horrible as the video is and as horrible this act of domestic violence is, maybe there is a silver lining in all of this.

North America is talking about domestic violence on the news, on YouTube, on websites and social media like never before. This horrible video may be the spark that brings about more change and I am not sure how to feel about that.

What are your thoughts on the Ray Rice incident? Can we turn this video into a gift for all of the women experiencing domestic violence (or any kind of violence) in the world?

 

Love & light,

Jeremie Miller
ILF Team Member & Guest Blogger

LABL 006: Being Present – Be Physically and Emotionally Present

Welcome to Episode #6 of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast Indrani and Andrea discuss being present. Specifically you will:

  • Reflect on all that you have learned
  • Determine your easiest path to living a brighter life
  • Reflect on your experiences over the course of the workshops
  • Assess your own shift in self-perception
  • Write a letter of self gratitude

Podcast Recording

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LABL 005: Restoring Self – Stand in Your Divine Power

Welcome to Episode #5 of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast Indrani and Andrea discuss restoring self. Specifically you will:

  • Learn about self care
  • Identify your self-care needs
  • Create a plan for your own replenishment
  • Be introduced to one restorative practice – Chakras

Podcast Recording

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LABL 004: Finding Resilience – Find Your Self Compassion

Welcome to Episode #4 of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live a Brighter Life Podcast Indrani and Andrea discuss how to find your resilience. Specifically you will:

  • Learn the importance of shame resilience
  • Understand the attributes of empathy
  • Identify your own shame story
  • Name your trusted network
  • Explore your strengths

Resources

I thought it was just me by Brené Brown

Podcast Recording

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LABL 003: Letting Go – Uncover Your Self-Respect

Welcome to Episode #3 of the Live A Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live A Brighter Life Podcast Indrani and Andrea discuss letting go. Specifically you will:

  • Define “shame”
  • Differentiate between shame, guilt, humiliation and embarrassment
  • Understand the dangers, irony, and contradictions of shame
  • Acknowledge triggers
  • Identify the sources of shame
  • Practice critical awareness

Resources

I Thought It Was Just Me by Brené Brown

Podcast Recording

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LABL 002: Saying “No” – Say “Yes” to a New Way

Welcome to Episode #2 of the Live A Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live A Brighter Life Podcast Indrani and Andrea discuss saying “No”. Specifically you will:

  • Learn to say “no” powerfully and positively
  • Create what you want
  • Protect what you value
  • Change what no longer works

Resources

The Power of a Positive No by William Ury

Podcast Recording

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LABL 001: Setting Boundaries – Define Your Personal Space

Welcome to Episode #1 of the Live A Brighter Life Podcast!

In this episode of the Live A Brighter Life Podcast Indrani and Andrea discuss boundaries. Specifically you will:

  • Be able to define “personal boundaries”
  • Know the types of personal boundaries
  • Understand the importance and purpose of personal boundaries
  • Be able to identify healthy and unhealthy boundaries
  • Be aware of when boundaries are crossed

Resources

Better Boundaries: Owning and Treasuring your Life by Jan Black and Greg Emms

Podcast Recording

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