doubt |dout|
noun
a feeling of uncertainty or lack of conviction
My question is: “Does doubt exist if you have conviction and the feeling of uncertainty?” I say yes and this is why. Conviction is a heart-felt concept. You feel conviction in your soul. You just know what is right by you.
Uncertainty… ah that is created by the ego. The ego and the personal identity that goes with it, are uneasy, threatened when the heart convictions don’t go along with the ego-flow. The ego is concerned about self-importance, stature, power, its about fluff up and puff out your chest, and spread those tail feathers wide. Hence the cliche “Proud as a peacock”. The ego is about self, “I”. It remembers, evaluates, plans and is the response to the physical & social world.
The ego’s entire goal is to drive the bus, to take you to where it thinks you should be.
When the ego and your heart-felt convictions, your truths, do not mesh up that creates uncertainty.
Uncertainty is like walking on stair steps in the dark and you are uncertain as you shift your weight on each step. Do you stay where you think you are stable or teeter down to the next step, perhaps falling over the step un-sure-footed. When you shift your weight from the comfort and stability of the ego and move your weight to the heart, the ego is telling you “huh oh, careful, watch out, warning, you could topple over, if you go with your heart you could _____fill in the blank_____________ and you don’t want that to happen!”
This is where faith in your heart comes is. Faith in listening to your heart, overcoming doubt, to know that next step is not going to take you tumbling. To follow your heart, your truth, your conviction may cause: ridicule, despise, anger, resentment, oh and a litany of things, but in the end you can ride out the affects because you know it is your truth, the foundation in which you are firmly planted on.
How do you work through your doubt when your ego’s uncertainty teeter-totters with your convictions?