I have been given the gift of some strong lessons this week.
The lessons were fast and furious. I was not prepared. I had let my guard down.

I managed to get through one night, then two nights and foolishly felt that the pain was gone.

I woke the next morning and began to brush my teeth to prepare for the day and thought, “How odd….the water is so warm and salty.”

I stopped to fiddle with the tap, only to realize that the water was OFF.
The warm and salty water was coming from my eyes. I was crying and didn’t even know it.

The eye faucets were wide open and I was drowning.

I allowed the tooth brush to fall into the sink and my head fell in after it and I wept.
I allowed the weeping to escape. I did not care that my hair was in the sink.
I only cared to weep.
Then, just as it began, the weeping stopped. I tied up my hair and continued to brush my teeth.

I have learned to accept that emotions come in waves.

When the wave crests I sometimes need to cry or weep. Sometimes the emotions are positive and I laugh out loud. I feel overcome by the emotion, whether I see it as positive or negative. What difference does it make to my brain whether I am crying out loud because of sadness or laughing out loud because of a joke?

My brain just needs me to honor the emotion and not shove them inside.

Society tells me that laughing out loud is more socially acceptable than weeping out loud.
I have even been told to “not laugh so hard” because I am embarrassing myself. Truth be told…I was actually embarrassing the other person.

So maybe you will find yourself with warm, salty water dripping from your saddened face and a tooth brush in your hand. Put down the toothbrush and honor the tears. You will feel a lot better, I promise.

Love and light,
Indrani